The Babysitters
by SeptemberMistAngel
Summary: What happens when Chick, Maria, Lightning, Sally, Francesco, and Emily babysit Sally and Maria's cousins? Oh, not much. The ingestion of a plastic banana, An argument over italian foods, name-calling, pillow throwing, and a lost baby. *shrug* nothin much.


Crack fic time!

Disney/Pixar owns Cars, I own Maria, Alicia, David, Alex, and Evangeline. Pancake3298 owns Emily.

Enjoy!

The Babysitters

* * *

"YOU LOST THE BABY?!"

Lightning winced. "It was an accident?"

Maria pointed at Chick. "His fault."

"Hey!" Chick defended himself. "Frannie over there was the one who insisted we take it out of the crib."

"Francesco had nothing to do with it!" Emily exclaimed. "It was all Maria!"

"Was not!"

... Let me back up.

* * *

Lightning sat down on the grass. "There's nothing to do..." He complained.

Chick grinned. "Sure there is. We could... Go rampage a Walmart... Or we could... Make fun of Francesco."

Francesco shook his head and looked up at him. "Why am I friends with you...?" He wondered aloud.

Lightning smirked. "Cause chicks are attracted to you."

Emily smiled and leaned closer to Francesco. "I am anyway." Then she realized Lightning's joke. "Light... Eww.."

Chick glared in Lightning's direction. "Do you guys HAVE to be mean to me?"

"Oh come on!" Francesco exclaimed. "You're-a the one who just suggested making-a fun of me!"

They were silent for a few minutes. It was quiet in the park, all except for the chirping of birds and the gush of the river. It had been a boring week of summer vacation. There were two weeks left before the school year started again.

Chick sat up. "Francesco, I know what we're going to do today!"

Francesco looked at him in a confused way. "Are you a-referencing to Phineas and-a Ferb?" Francesco looked around. "Hey, where's Emi?"

She stood a few feet away, on her cell phone.

Lightning sighed. "This is boring... I wish Sally was here... Or even Maria. It's fun to watch her kick Chick's butt at skateboarding."

Chick glared. "You said you wouldn't bring that up again!"

Emily ran over just then. "Guys, Maria just called me. She wants us to come over."

Chick stood up. "Better than sitting around here all day." He took a step forward, only to catch his foot on a tree root and fall to the ground.

"Or falling." Lightning added, then he, Emily, and Francesco ran.

* * *

Lightning knocked on the door of the Carrera's house.

Chick looked at him in shock. "Dude... You just knocked two times!"

Lightning looked at him weird. "Annnddd?"

"That's bad luck!" Chick said. He looked down. "And you're stepping on a crack!" Sudden realization hit him. "OH MY GOD... It's Friday the thirteenth..."

Francesco rolled his eyes. "You Moron, It's the Saturday the twelfth."

The door opened just then, and Maria stood there. "Hey, guys." She greeted. "Come on in."

They followed her to the living room, where Sally was sitting on the sofa. Nearby, in a chair, a little two year old boy sat. Beside the sofa was a small crib, in which an eight month old baby girl was sleeping. Sally held a finger up to her lips. "Hey." She greeted with a smile.

Lightning sat down beside her. "So you're on babysitting duty today?"

She giggled. "I don't mind. I'm getting paid twenty bucks to do it."

Lightning grinned. "What are you going to do with it?"

"Put it in college savings." Sally replied.

"Why would you want to do a crazy thing like that?!" Chick asked, walking over, eating a banana.

"What is it with you and bananas?!" Francesco wondered.

"Where did you even get that?" Sally asked. "We haven't bought any bananas in weeks."

Chick looked at her, confused. "It was on the table. In a bowl."

"Chick, those are plastic!" Sally exclaimed in horrified disgust.

Chick began spitting pieces of fake banana out of his mouth. "I thought it had a suspicious crunch to it!"

Francesco looked down at the baby in the crib. "Aww... What's her name?"

"Evangeline." Sally replied. "She's eight months old."

The little boy who had been sitting quietly until now stood up and walked over to his cousin Maria. He looked between her and Chick, who was still spitting out plastic banana and wiping his tongue on a napkin.

The little boy looked up at Maria. "Mawia, is he your son?"

Maria about exploded laughing, and Chick glared at her. He wiped another piece off of his tongue, then walked over to the little boy. "No, Alex, I'm not her son, I'm her boyfriend."

Alex laughed. "You're silly! You can't be her boyfwiend!"

"Why not?" Chick questioned.

"Cause," He replied, "She's waaaayy too older than you."

Maria began laughing again, now doubled over. Chick glared in her direction. "You know he just called you old?"

Maria smirked. "What's funny is that he called you YOUNG!"

"BURN!" Lightning exclaimed.

Chick walked over to Sally. "Hey, how much did you say you were getting paid to do this?"

"Twenty." She replied.

Chick smiled. "I'm a little short on cash lately... Want to let me watch em?"

Emily scoffed. "Geez, Chick, half the time, YOU'RE the one that needs watching."

Just then, Sally's phone buzzed. She picked it up. "Oh, dang it!" She exclaimed.

"What's wrong?" Lightning asked.

"I just remembered I was supposed to go to the library today for my..." She trailed off.

"For what?" Emily asked.

Sally sighed. She'd already practically spilled it. "For my tutoring session. I've been having trouble in algebra."

"What's wrong with that?" Lightning asked. "Lots of people need tutors. I needed one in fourth grade for reading. Chick ought to have one daily for mental issues."

"I'm gonna kill you." Chick said to Lightning.

Maria shook her head. "For God's sake, tone down the violence, Chick! there's kids here!"

Chick snickered. "Alright. Wouldn't want to be a bad influence on Frannie."

Francesco rolled his eyes. He turned back to Sally. "Really, we will-a keep an eye on them. It can't be that hard."

Sally hesitated. "Well... Okay." She smiled. "What could go wrong?"

* * *

"This is agent Hicks reporting to agent Turbo. Come in, agent Turbo. Is the baby in sight?"

"Good God, Chick." Maria said, shaking her head. "Emily's right there, the baby hasn't moved since you've been here, and how is that remote control a walkie-talkie?"

Chick looked at her with a suspicious look. "It's disguised..." He gasped. "You're an enemy spy!" He tackled Maria and held her down. "Tell me what you know! What are your plans?"

"Ugh! Get off me!" Maria shouted. She looked up at him. "I know that you'd better get off of me right now, or my plans will be to Murder you!"

Lightning shook his head. "Chick, you have been playing WAY too much CHROME: Training Base 3."

Just then, Alex ran up to Francesco. "I hungry." He whined.

Francesco stood up. "I will-a make you some pasta with-a herb sauce and rotisserie chicken. Garlic bread, and-a salad with caesar dressing."

The little boy made a gagging sound. "Don't want that. Want baloney! Duh..."

"Yeah, Francesco." Emily said teasingly. "Baloney. Duh..."

Chick snickered. "What he said before WAS baloney. All that Italian food." Chick rolled his eyes.

Francesco glared. "I refuse to cook under this mockery!"

Lightning walked up to Alex and kneeled beside him. "Your cousin Sally said we could eat pizza, then cookies. Would you like that?"

"I would." Chick said.

Francesco's jaw dropped. "PIZZA IS ITALIAN FOOD!"

Chick nodded. "I know."

"You racist, indecisive,-"

"Whatever. Let's eat." Chick interrupted.

* * *

Lightning gently placed baby Evangeline in her highchair and slid it up to the table. He got the baby food out of the refrigerator and a baby spoon from the drawer. Then he handed them both to Chick. "Feed her."

Chick looked helplessly back and forth between the baby and the mashed sweet potatoes. "Uhhh..."

Emily snatched the baby food and tilted the chair that Chick was in to dump him out of it. "Move over." She said.

Chick stood up and stuck his tongue out at her. Emily pretended to be in shock. She gasped. "He stuck his tongue out at me! I've-a never been so insulted in-a my life!" She shouted sarcastically.

Emily sat down in the chair and smiled at Evangeline "Hey, sweetie. Are you hungry?" She asked.

The baby smiled and giggled, so Emily took that as a yes.

Chick sat down beside Maria. "Hey, sweetie. Are you hungry?"

Maria looked at Lightning. "Can I kill Chick?"

A few minutes later, Chick stood up and walked to the kitchen, then came back with ketchup. Lightning looked at him in confusion. "What are you using that for?"

"The pizza." Chick replied as if it was obvious.

Francesco and Emily looked at him in horrified disgust. "Why would-a you ruin it?!" They asked simultaneously.

"It's better this way." Chick replied, squirting generous amounts of ketchup onto his slice.

"Chick, you're nasty!" Francesco exclaimed.,

"Revolting." Emily agreed, trying not to gag.

Chick looked over at Lightning. "Are they exchange students?" He asked, pointing at the two Italians.

"Yeah, why?" Lightning asked.

Chick sighed in exasperation. "When can we exchange them back?"

* * *

"Naptime." Lightning announced, picking up Alex and playfully dropping him on the sofa, then laying the blanket over him.

Chick grinned. "Naptime!" He exclaimed, running over to the sofa that Maria was laying on and jumping on top of her, drawing a loud OOMPH! From her. He sat up. "Heeelllllooooo, Maria."

She barely glanced at him before standing up. "Goodbye, Chick."

Standing in the corner of the room, Francesco was rocking baby Eva back and forth in his arms. Emily walked up to him and peered down at the baby. "Shhh..." Francesco whispered. "She's asleep-"

CRASH!

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"Crap."

"CHICK!" Maria shouted from where Chick had tripped over his own feet, fallen into Maria, and knocked them both into the coffee table.

"Sorry!" Chick apologized, standing up and lifting Maria, then began pretending to dust her off. She shoved him away.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Evangeline continued screaming.

Francesco glared at Chick. "She was asleep!"

Chick nodded. "'WAS' being the key word."

Alex began to cry and slammed his head into the pillows. "I can't sleep wif all this noise!" He whined.

"I feel your pain, kid." Chick said in understanding.

"OUT!" Maria shouted, pushing Chick towards the doorway into the kitchen. "OUT, OUT, OUT!"

* * *

"Can I come back in?" Chick whispered twenty minutes later, seeing both the kids asleep.

"No!" Lightning whispered back. "Unless you can promise not trip over anything!"

"I promise." Chick said, and tiptoed in. Or attempted to. He wasn't much good at tiptoeing, and indeed looked more like a prancing horse.

Chick sat on the sofa in between Francesco and Emily, forcing Emily to move over. Chick grinned at Francesco. "Hi, Frannie."

"Go away." Francesco said, shoving him. Chick, being the scrawny, thin teenager he was, fell off the couch.

"Ow." Was the only thing heard from him.

"Serves ya right." Lightning said.

Chick looked at him with a crushed expression. "That hurts, man. I'm wounded." He said sarcastically.

Lightning just rolled his eyes.

* * *

A while later Evangeline woke up. Francesco, seeing that she was full of energy, lowered the crib rail, picked her up, and set her on the floor so that she could crawl around.

Another little while later, Alex woke up. They gave him a snack and have him some toys, but he'd realized something. "Where's sissy?" He asked.

Lightning looked around. The safety gate had gotten moved from the doorway... "Guys... Where's Eva?"

Emi and Maria looked up in shock. Chick and Francesco began looking around. Chick tossed the sofa blankets and pillows. "Not there!"

Lightning happened to glance up at the clock. "Oh my gosh! Guys, Sally will be back in ten minutes! We gotta find her!"

* * *

*Cough cough!* "Okay, guys, she's not under the sofa!" Chick called.

They paid him no attention, but kept searching. Soon enough, they'd searched everywhere. "What are we going to do?!" Lightning exclaimed.

"Oh, tell Sally, who'll tell Eva's parents, who'll file a lawsuit, that'll get us in jail, that we'll bust out of, and then move to Antarctica." Chick replied calmly.

"What about moving to Antarctica?" Sally asked standing in the doorway. "Hey, guys, I'm back. Everything go okay?"

"Fine."

"Perfect."

"Dandy."

"Swell."

"Awful." Chick finished, earning him glares from everyone.

Sally rolled her eyes. "It couldn't have been THAT bad." She smiled and walked over to Alex, hugging him. "Hey, buddy. Did you have fun?"

"Yeah, but they lost sissy."

Sally looked up at Lightning. "You what?"

Lightning grimaced.

"YOU LOST THE BABY?!"

Lightning winced. "It was an accident?"

Maria pointed at Chick. "His fault."

"Hey!" Chick defended himself. "Frannie over there was the one who insisted we take it out of the crib."

"Francesco had nothing to do with it!" Emily exclaimed. "It was all Maria!"

"Was not!" Maria exclaimed.

"Who cares who lost the baby?! Let's just find her! Or else my aunt and uncle will file a lawsuit against us that'll get us in jail, that we'll have to bust out of, and then be forced to move to Antarctica!" Sally exclaimed.

They all began frantically searching. They searched everywhere. Attic to basement. Bathrooms, bedrooms, closets. Everywhere.

"Oh, we're all gonna die!" Chick exclaimed, beginning to cry.

"Oh, suck it up, you big baby!" Maria exclaimed hitting him in the arm. "That's the least of our problems!"

Just then there was a knock on the door and Sally's Aunt and Uncle walked inside. "Hello, Sally, Maria, Emily. And The Three stooges." Her uncle David said, indicating the guys. He always called them that teasingly.

Alex ran up to his dad. "Hey, son." He said with a smile. He looked at Sally. "Did they behave?"

Sally scoffed. "The kids or the babysitters?"

"Aww..." Her aunt Alicia said softly. "Look at Eva. Asleep in her crib with her bunny and her blanket."

"WHAT?!" They all exclaimed, rushing forward.

There, in the crib, lay Eva, a blanket laying on her that appeared to have just been thrown over her. And that was when everyone realized it. Francesco had left the crib rail down, allowing Eva to climb back in. Chick, when he'd crashed into Maria and the coffee table, waking Eva up, had cost Eva part of a nap, thus she'd climbed back in to continue it. And Chick, when they'd begun searching for Eva, had recklessly thrown her blanket, causing it to land over the baby, concealing all but her face and hair.

Never assuming to find the baby in the crib, they hadn't looked. And yet, she'd been there in plain site all along.

Alicia smiled at the group of teens. "Thanks for watching them, guys. Next time I need a babysitter, I know who to call."

They all exchanged a glance, then ran away from the house as fast as their legs could carry them.

The life of the babysitter was not for them!

* * *

Pfft. The ending sucked. Plz review anyway! :D


End file.
